It’s a special time of the year when winter slowly gives way to spring. There’s a sense of rebirth and hope associated with the season, plus it’s always awesome to get home from work at night and it not be pitch-black dark outside.
It’s nearly impossible to peg any season as the “favorite” season for White Chicks. All four of them have their own unique appeal to this truly special and wonderful species. But the magic of spring not only lies in its warm weather and increasing amounts of sunlight per day, it’s also the season’s unique ability to re-introduce the words “…and Arts Festival” into White Chick parlance year after year after year.
Or maybe it's a Beer Festival. Or a Wine Festival. Bonus points if there's a parade. Double bonus if part of the arts and crafts includes a booth of unique jewelry made out of repurposed something or other.
Regardless of its subject matter, White Chicks Cherish Spring Festival Season and barely need a good reason to dress cute and go drink outside with their BFFs.
Spring Festival Season generally kicks off with St. Patrick’s Day and is quite a heralded time of the year for White Chicks. These glorious events usually take part in certain “cool neighborhoods” in larger cities, public parks/green spaces or perhaps a closed-down Main Street area or a sectioned-off, walkable and relatively safe retail district. Outdoor Spring Festivals are essentially the exact same thing as Overdressing for College Football Games for White Chicks in that the event(s) involve super-cute outfits and day drinking. Only replace football games with live bands, glorious arts and crafts and handmade jewelry.
Because Festival Season usually begins on the cusp of two seasons, it affords White Chicks the opportunity to merge their favorite forms of fashion from Winter and Spring. There are two ways to view this phenomenon as well: 1) White Chicks are defiantly holding on to their favorite winter clothing items (namely boots and tights). 2) White Chicks are slightly jumping the gun on busting out the preferred items of their spring wardrobe (i.e. sundresses, flip-flops, gladiator sandals, etc.)
(Author’s note: the above paragraph and possibly this entire post may only apply to White Chicks in temperate climates like the Southeast, Gulf Coast, Texas and portions of the West Coast. WWCC would like to extend a heartfelt apology to White Chicks in parts of the country that actually still have to deal with winter weather well into March and early April. Bummer for you. For real. That really must suck.)
Festival Season outfits look like a super cute explosion occurred in a White Chick’s closet right between her winter and spring items. There may be tall boots tucked into ridiculously expensive blue jeans (REBJ). But there may also be sundresses with cowboy boots. Or maybe the REBJs will be rolled the enormous mid-calf cuff and paired with cute sandals. Maybe there’s even a summer scarf (or perhaps a festive boa?) or two involved. And you can bet your ass there will be Oversized Sunglasses, which may or may not get destroyed depending on the rowdiness of said festival.
Another White Chick item that tends to make its debut around Festival Season is the Over-sized Handbag Designed by an Outdoor Clothing Company. Maybe its real name is a “day pack,” or “hiking pack” or “lumbar pack,” but in all actuality it’s an overpriced, glorified fanny pack with additional straps to enable it to double as a purse-like bag with additional storage space for White Chick Festival Season Gear.
From her digital camera to her cell phone to a personalized water bottle to her wallet to her denim jacket (in case the temps get cold later in the day) to a back-up water bottle filled with vodka (just in case), this bag basically does everything an over-sized handbag is capable of doing, but it's designed to better handle the outdoors. And, it will be branded with The North Face, Columbia, REI, Marmot, Mountain Hardwear or Pattagonia logo. Plus, the Over-sized Handbag Designed by an Outdoor Clothing Company gives White Chicks a lot of faux-hippie cred with the jam band world when they carry these bags to outdoor summer concerts by Dave Matthews, Phish or Widespread Panic versus their regular Over Sized Handbags.
But the best part of Festival Season is the word “Season” itself. This is no “one and done” time of the year. If up to date on the goings-on in her given city/geographic region, a well-informed White Chick and her crew of adorable BFFs can easily find at least one outdoor festival per weekend to attend through late May. Possibly even June. And that’s a lot of time for cute outfits, day drinking and general merriment in glorious sunshine-y weather...and of course plenty of photo-ops, because White Chicks love taking pictures of, like, everything they do.
And seriously, dearest reader, if you've read down this far you may as well click on an ad!